Entrails

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We’re in a Leviticus teaching series at church. Among other WOW moments lies this nugget: Having received what to us seem laborious instructions (AKA rules); the people received this assurance: the offering you bring will be pleasing to God. Having wondered long exactly what differed between Cain and Abel’s gifts of worship; and considered my own fresh loaves basketed with surely-smelly fish; this assurance seems no small thing. Anyway, all that is only to invite you, if interested, to listen in: hcbellingham.com.

The following is a sermon response to Leviticus 16

Day of Atonement; Entrails
I wonder if a Levitical priest ever were squeamish;
   averse to blood, fat lobules, entrails…
Life’s most vulnerable parts—offered up.
And if we bend to lay this fragile offering,
We will tumble all the way down
Into be-longing.

Are we squeamish?
Reluctant to engage our most vulnerable place-holders
Let alone hold them open for other eyes—
To gawk, scorn, press us into shame.
We are practiced at slinging shame.

Will you let holy fire lick your wound?
(Tho cauterizing will not stop the pain)
You will surely feel it when nerve endings begin regrowth:
When we, on our Day of Atonement—
   suddenly brave with Christ—
Exhale on, “Why have you abandoned me?”

Perhaps if the whole congregation holds these words…
   Communal hands;
Then grace will flow that leads to healing.

jfig     10/2023

JFigLeave a comment

Luke 12:1 states, ” …when so many thousands of the people had gathered together that they were trampling one another…” Metaphorically speaking, this sounds like society today—the public arena. One tries to take it in cautiously measured doses. Otherwise, the rhetoric is simply too overwhelming. But this passage helps.

When there were so many people hungry, hoping for healing, and crying out—because they had seen him do a miracle— Jesus warned, beware of hypocrisy.

2020 flashback: Perhaps it is not ‘privilege’ that is to be feared; cringed away from as if one could shed this dreaded ‘skin.’ Perhaps privilege is simply a gift—to be stewarded. Perhaps it is hypocrisy with which we must wrestle long into the night; the unearthing of which does not begin with others (in spite of how much we like to look elsewhere), but with careful digging to examine the soil in one’s own heart.

Among gardening tasks, digging (shoveling of any kind), is the one that leaves my muscles sorest. Just like weeding, one cannot complete the task without bending a bit. There is much work yet to be done…

[Luk 12:1 ESV] 1 In the meantime, when so many thousands of the people had gathered together that they were trampling one another, he began to say to his disciples first, “Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy. “Luke 12 (ESV) – In the meantime, when so.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 1 May, 2023. https://www.blueletterbible.org/esv/luk/12/1/s_985001.

Surrender

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Repentance
rests upon the threshold...waiting
soft gleam of redemption’s warmth beckoning—
just across the sill.

It is good to tarry,
empty pockets
afore measured steps across
this unlikely beam.

Just landing here
required effort—
bushwhacking through, 
disentangling.

One might tarry yet,
catch breath from the climb,
unweight again.
Then, whether you leap, or dive...

The Father’s net will catch you,
as if you had simply walked.
But you will experience the dive.
Shachah

Jfig     2/2023

Surrender…is an unlikely word, or practice. There is nothing in our current social milieu that advocates for such. It is beyond high risk, whether you are an adrenalin junkie, or not. Surrender, leaves everything behind. As a follower of Jesus, it is sometimes good practice to return to the deep edge, and once again make the leap.

Fairest Lord Jesus, this feels a bit like 'double dare.' You surrendered everything. Whose turn is it now? The precipice is high; the fall terrifying. It will take all of you: Father, Son, Spirit to catch me this time. But trust runs deep... I’m leaping.   J

1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

“Hebrews 12 (NIV) – Therefore, since we are surrounded.” Blue Letter Bible. Web. 28 Feb, 2023. https://www.blueletterbible.org/niv/heb/12/1-3/p1/s_1145001.

Sinking

JFig3 Comments 
Perhaps Lent...
is about sinking into the depths of redemption,
receiving sacrifice
and allowing all
our carefully crafted idols
to fall--
disappear beneath the waves
of God's goodness and mercy.

Endless waves,
the sea gate held open.

Perhaps this is the way we get to our knees--
by accepting the buckling weight
of so great a love as this--
that One Holy would lay down his life
awash in shame
for my pitiable state--
and hold the gate
Open.


jfig     2/2023

Solstice

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Solstice

The darkest night
still
waits for morning…
even when it feels no
‘welcome.’

Wind sighs—
collapses in exhale
leaving room for
rhythms—
ribbons of air…
serpentine currents when felt in
cavernous dark.
Our Lord
met us here—in the cave.

Allow the dawn,
its light to creep
slowly—not jarring
into the place one’s soul wanders,
and wonder…

Is there a God,
God of goodness who
made the light?
If you must hold your breath—
hold it with

the wild possibility
that hope—tightly balled into
winter’s fist—
may find The Child
and yet survive.

jfig     12/2022

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. he chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created."
"James 1 (NIV) - Every good and perfect gift." Blue Letter Bible. Web. 21 Dec, 2022. <https://www.blueletterbible.org/niv/jas/1/17/s_1147017>.

If I wrote this poem for no one else, Lord, I would write it for my friend, who wanders in the dark, knowing that you are God. We all wander, and wonder. And wait…for your faithfulness, which finds us again, and again, and again. You find us, because you are here, waiting as well, breathless with the expectation that we will look up. Thank you…from the humblest of hearts, that you would creep low; tarry that we might bump into you often enough to become familiar…old friends for the journey; and company us safely home. Amen

Decades

JFigLeave a comment 
Approximately
30 years ago, I
begged God
plz, plz, plz, take me
along
in your wondrous, matchless work—
set people free.

20 years ago, hands full
of laundry and littles, I
wrestled...hard
came away limping.
How???
"Absorb," He said
"Who I Am."

10 years ago, I
bartered. If
you give me a spacious place (to fold laundry and care for not-so-littles)
I will keep working on that.
Apparently, God
was unimpressed by my terms.
He did set me in a spacious place.

And then began to set me free.

jfig     thanksbetoGod

Sometimes it is meaningful to look back; to see what God was doing...when. Compelled by Isaiah 61, so much angst I experienced, in trying to make a difference, with what felt like limited internal resources for a global moment. All the while, God kept pouring in, filling the reservoir bit by bit with what (I did not know) I needed. Father, Son, Spirit—present and alive—abundant, full, overflowing in goodness. These verses: Isaiah 61; Luke 4:18-19; Psalm 18:1-3 are especially meaningful to me in the context of life purpose.
soul spaces

The God Who Stays

JFigLeave a comment 
You are...
the God Who Stays,
light that remains when every.other.candle
lies extinguished.

Deep...
in the hollows of the earth
you carved a shelter,
holding space for resurrection.

We needed to know...
life can be born, and re-borne
in the sanctuary of
Your fire-breathing Presence.

How fierce...
this love that burns within, and without us
but does not consume
save the dross.

You are...
the God Who Stays.

You are...
the God Who Stays
long enough to shred two sides - 
the opaque curtain called 'belonging.'
We needed to know...
that Father stayed, too: waiting, watching
for vision's redemption—holiness unleashed
a billion twinkling stars, set free.

Which one of you first breathed
"It is finished,"
or was that merely cue—
Holy Spirit to join you

in the ripe, hungry
fields of men, women
few, many
unseen, longing?

You are the God Who Stays.

jfig      5/2022

Dear Reading Friend, this is the first in a 3-part ‘observation’ regarding the desperate, reverberating cry, ‘Abandoned!?…?!’; I believe there is a God who hears and tends to this cry. These are not easy words to hear, “I have been abandoned…” Nor is this easy truth to absorb. It seems one has to wrestle a bit. Perhaps a lot. The wrestling feels important: there is no other cry so crashing our airwaves right now. The following verses might be of interest: Philippians 3:20-21; Luke 23:44-46; John 19:30

I have chosen the attached photo because it speaks to me of both what we think we know, and of perspective. I have been wrestling with this topic for a while; years, in fact. When it comes to ‘knowing’, I have as much access to scripture as anyone; and more than many. I have much less Biblical scholarship. My perspective on abandonment is a narrow window; but a thoughtful one. I have tried to look a long way off. Toward that end, your constructive thoughts are welcome. j

daring prayer

JFigLeave a comment

Father of Holiness,

We long to see you—the pillars of fire by which you lead us lighting up the night sky—as you lead the way out of darkness into eternal light.

Help us to understand the gap between you and us that can only be bridged by the sacrificial love of Christ. May we dare to cross—toes engage the threshold—day after day following you into newness of life. May we willingly carry stones (while you carry us) that your good purpose will lay to extend the bridge, into spaces our eyes have yet to see.

We want to dance with you, in your company of holiness; stripped of sin and willfulness. We want to see your stars.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

jfig 4/2022 #ps-almighty

Prayer of Return: Leaning

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Prayer of return:  leaning

My soul might faint (faint it does)
but still must get up
and feed babies...
mine, and perhaps some others as well.

Even midst the valley of tears
babes hunger—
they are multiplying cells so fast

I am just beginning
to see
that you have not equipped me to keep up

But to lean—
lean heavily, in fact
on the God of infinite supply.

jfig     winter 21/22

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

the words of Jesus from Matthew 5:3.


And Abraham lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, behind him was a ram, caught in a thicket by his horns. And Abraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering instead of his son. So Abraham called the name of that place, “The Lord will provide,” as it is said to this day, ‘On the mount of the Lord it shall be provided.’ Genesis 22:13,14

The year 2022 is full of things that need fixing and rescuing. But there is One who came to be our rescue. Prophets foretold it. Simeon saw it. Dare we believe it? Believe that He came not only to ‘rescue’ us from sin as individuals, but to invite us into the abundance of God’s goodness. Into belonging. Into H-O-P-E written overtop the anxieties that grab me when I read the news.

Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

This post is dedicated to my friends at https://thedihedral.com/ who are a consistent source of encouragement to me.